OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Randomize
