I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Randomize
