You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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