Christians are straight up FREAKS
I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Randomize
