I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Randomize
