Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Randomize
