grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Randomize
