I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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