one two three fourrrrnication!
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
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