check it out our google latitudes are spooning
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
