The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
