Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
