I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
The air taste purple.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
