Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
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