Girls should come with a carfax report
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
did i just pee glitter
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