Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Randomize
