There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Randomize
