Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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