I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
whose ass print is on the piano?
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize
