We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Randomize
