Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I am spending my child support on dildos
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Randomize