Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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