Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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