can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Randomize
