And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Randomize
