do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
