Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(404): View more from Georgia

I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?

(503): View more from Oregon

Succeeded.

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(940): View more from Texas

I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.

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(201): View more from New Jersey

Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.

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(803): View more from South Carolina

i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.

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(704): View more from North Carolina

we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong

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(916): View more from California

I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.

(1-916): View more from California

Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.

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(916): View more from California

When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.

(1-916): View more from California

Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off

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(256): View more from Alabama

Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.

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(702): View more from Nevada

you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.

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