when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Randomize
