I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
