how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
