Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Randomize
