In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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