I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
