i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
