I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Randomize
