If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
