if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
my shit smells like andre
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Randomize
