it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
