someone threw a dead crab at me
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
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