he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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