my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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