Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
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