Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Randomize
