There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
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