That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Randomize
