in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I wanna passion pit in your ass
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
My ass is underappreciated
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Randomize
