i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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