apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I don't �care how much you're grieving �a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.�
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
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