You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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