out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
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